Temple built for Higgs-Boson God particle in Tamil Nadu, devotees throng to get darshan

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Aarthi being perfromed for Lord Higgs-Boson

In what is a testament to Hinduism’s assimilative capacity, the elusive Higgs-Boson or God particle has been admitted as a full fledged God into the Hindu pantheon and a temple in His honor has been built in Tamil Nadu’s Kancheepuram district.

Confirming the development, Swami Vajranand Sarwasti, head of the decade old Higgs-Boson consciousness sect dedicated to the propagation of devotion to Lord Higgs-Boson and attainment of spiritual salvation by chanting His name, said, “Ever since CERN confirmed that they had discerned the Lord’s temporal presence after detecting a bump in the mass range based on the data generated from collisions of trillions of sub-atomic particles, we have been inundated with calls by eager devotees seeking a darshan of Higgs-Boson bhagwaaan. So we decided to build a temple in His honour to satisfy the cravings of His devotees.”

In addition to the sanctum sanctorum housing the idol of Lord Higgs-Boson, the temple’s walls will feature murals and carvings depicting data from CERN’s experiments involving over 500 trillion collisions between protons and anti-protons since 2001 in the 27 km long Large Hadron Collider (LCH), so that devotees can feel His divine presence at a more spiritual, metaphysical level.

But how will He be represented in idol form since thus far only His presence has been validated, not visual form? “Dude, most Gods and Goddesses in the Hindu pantheon are anthropomorphic so why should Lord Higgs-Boson be any exception unless CERN tells us otherwise. We have asked devotees to send in their submissions from which we will finalize the Lord’s image. The only guideline we venture is that He should be imbued with classical Aryan features. For the time being, we’ll just go with a notional Google search generated image of the Lord,” replied Swami Vajranand.

“However, let me make it clear at the outset that we will not accept pictures of Rajnikant, Sachin Tendulkar or Rahul Bose. We are very clear about this,” he hastened to add.

Swamiji has also requested the Government to subsidize the annual pilgrimage of devotees to CERN headquarters to pay obeisance at the Large Hadron Collider where the Lord’s divine presence was first detected.

In related news, upcoming Godman Swami Brahmanand has claimed that he is an avatar of Higgs-Boson and CERN can stop conducting any more experiments to validate His presence. “Once they submit to me with full faith and experience the divine rays of spiritual energy emanating from me, their lingering doubts will melt away and they will go back with 10 sigma proof  that Swami Brahmanand and Higgs-Boson are one and the same,” claimed the Swamiji.


Related posts:

  1. Didi demands HiggsBoson be renamed Higgs-Bongo since credit should go to all Bengalis, not just Bose
  2. In search of (the) God (particle)
  3. Digvijay Singh discovers his own ‘God Particle’: the Diggs-RaSon particle
  4. Tamil Nadu’s free laptop, livestock distribution scheme goes awry: farmers get laptops, students cows
  5. Kerala may buy Dubai with temple treasure
 



  • http://madrasapattinam.wordpress.com/ Iqbal Selvan

    Can’t stop laughing !!! Never know

  • R.K.Kutty

    This is the big problem of Indian faith. Anyone would turn so hypocritical to pose as bhagwan in our country and venture for such hero worship culture, though the reality is otherwise. Both Peter Higgs and SN Bose didn’t envision this kind of a practice of godifying their theory. In fact, what they both wanted to convey was that the big hand of an unseen, unfathomable, and Almighty power worked behind to give mass to the matter, lest the matter would have been in floating state without any kind of shape or size. This kind of dedicating a Temple for Higgs-Boson is sheer stupidity and is against the Godly tenets. That was the reason,Indian Vedamtic philosophy, which never propagated any kind of idol-worship, got dented for ages, till its real contents were translated in vernacular language.

  • Bharad

    I dare you to write something funny about islam or prophet ;-) ha ha

  • Shekhar

    Give it up, everyone. For god’s sake, this is a satirical piece.

  • VallaryPatric

    Yeah, this one is expected as people come up with new versions of faith and love to have discovered a set of followers, there will be a group like that as man keeps searching for answers!

  • George K

    The reverse would follow – Gods would be created and outnumber the people living on the planet. The question then is who to worship?

  • http://www.siddharulagam.org srikrishna uthavar

    please immediatlely visit our holliest web site www,sidhharulagam.org for final confirmation of the one and only true realastic image of the avatar of higgs boson gods particle – sarvam sri krishnarpanam idhu satyam sathyam sathyam subam sarvamangalam – srikrishna uthavar – mobile +00919942989550

  • http://www.boutiquechaisedebar.net/ boutiquechaisedebar.net

    I almost never leave a response, however i did some searching and wound up here Temple built
    for Higgs-Boson God particle in Tamil Nadu, devotees throng to get
    darshan | The UnReal Times. And I actually do have 2 questions for you if
    it’s allright. Is it just me or does it appear like a few of these comments look as if they are coming from brain dead individuals? :-P And, if you are posting on other online social sites, I’d like to follow everything new you
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    twitter feed, Facebook page or linkedin profile?