Danny Morrison goes into depression on learning that he can’t say “DLF maximum” anymore

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DLF's exit has left Danny inconsolable

Former New Zealand cricketer and cricket’s most animated commentator, Danny Morrison has been in low spirits, after real estate giant DLF announced that it would no longer be sponsoring the Indian Premier League. Danny, widely known and revered for his fevered, over-the-top commentary during the IPL, admits having gone into depression ever since he realized he wouldn’t be able to utter the phrase “DLF maximum” for every sixer that goes over the fence.

“Come on, mean! How dya expect me to hold up with such an absolute treegedy?!? During the IPL, for every bit of mosquito-infeasted eer that I inheeled, I exheeled these very words and more so, when Chris Gayle was beating the deeylights outta the bowlers. Such being the kease, it just breeks my little heart to know that I won’t be screaming these words ever ageen,” cried Danny, before scrambling to his room and slamming the door behind him.

Kim Morrison, Danny’s better half told The UnReal Times that Danny has been out of sorts ever since he received a text message from his co-commentator Laxman Sivaramakrishnan which read, “Hey Daniel Kyle Morrison, guess what! I can still continue blissfully gloating over Karbonn Kamaal catches *under pressure*, but you can’t say DLF maximum anymore! Bwahaha! :D.”

“It’s funny how some people get so emotionally and sentimentally attached to certain things. In all the years that I’ve known Danny, I’ve never seen him this upset, not even when he once held the world record for the maximum number of Test ducks. People used to call him ‘The Duckman‘ all the time, but he always took it in good humor. But one text from Lux.. man.. seeva.. rumma.. krishnan was enough to reduce Danny to tears,” she said.

Readers might recall that Danny Morrison has been the most invested commentator in IPL’s various catch phrases such as ‘Karbon Kamaal Catch’, ‘Citi Moment of Success’, ‘Maxmobile Strategic Timeout’ and particularly the ‘DLF Maximum’. Danny has also been responsible for much of the innovation surrounding the usage of these catch phrases. For instance, whenever Gayle hit a hapless bowler for a six, Danny would either use a simple “That’s a DLF maximum!” or thrill viewers with one of the several variants such as “That’s a DLFer!” and “He DLFed it miles over long on!”

Indian commentating legend, Ravi Shastri, has called in on Danny to express his support and help him through this tough period. Ravi shared with Danny, pearls of wisdom from his experience, and in a rather generous gesture, promised to pass on his database of cliches that would help Danny describe any match, cricket or non-cricket.

A cheered up Danny is now back in the game, and was seen repeating to himself catch-phrases such as “That’s a Rupa Frontline Maximum!” and “That’s a Rajnigandha Maximum!” presumably to prepare himself, regardless of who IPL’s new title sponsor may be.

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