Skit: Arvind Kejriwal restores power at Sushil Kumar Shinde’s house

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During the course of the bijli-pani Satyagraha, Shri Arvind Kejriwal received a request from one Mrs. Shinde of 2, Krishna Menon Marg, New Delhi to help restore electricity to her residence. The Shindes had apparently forgotten to pay their electricity bill, resulting in disconnection.

We present below the transcript of what ensued next:

It is 6:30 PM. Shri Kejriwal promptly lands up at the VIP bungalow in the heart of Lutyens along with his lieutenants, Shri Manish Sisodiya and Mayank Gandhi.

The bungalow is shrouded in relative darkness, as one of its denizens is anxiously prancing up and down the verandah.  Two elegantly dressed ladies are sitting on the extensive lawn outside. One, with her sari draped around her forehead, is vacuously staring into the night sky, while the other, resplendent, despite the fading light, in a green sari and equally conspicuous bright, red lipstick, is chatting away in a clipped accent about her Oxbridge days.

The IAC activists, sporting trademark Gandhi caps, gingerly make their way past the two ladies to the main entrance Mr. Kejriwal is carrying an electrician’s kit. Mrs. Shinde rushes out to welcome the trio into the drawing room.

Mrs. Shinde (visibly relieved): Thank you, IAC people for coming to our rescue. You see, Shindeji forgot to pay his bill and the Sheila Dixit government promptly cut off our power supply. As if that’s not enough, we’ve been fined 10 times the bill amount. Without paying this,our power connection will not be restored. Please kuch kijiye.

Mayank Gandhi: Don’t worry, Mrs. Shinde. You did the right thing in calling us. We will fix your power problem.

Mrs. Shinde: Oh and by the way, let me introduce you to my guests who really need no introduction. Pratibha tai and Sagarika Ghosh.

(Pratibha Patil smiles and folds her hands in a Namaste. Sagarika appears amused.)

Sagarika: Oh, some dhartiputras from IAC. How quaint.

Mrs. Shinde: Oh by the way, Rahul ji will be joining us later for dinner. So all of you hang around, ok?

(Suddenly a plaintive, screech of ‘nahii’ rings through the air. Mrs. Shinde’s grand-son barges into the drawing room, appearing peeved.)

Kid: Oh no, not again, dadi ma. That means we have to eat dal-roti for dinner again tonight. Why don’t you invite Gadkari uncle over these days?

(Mrs. Shinde glares at her grandson sternly, and puts hers finger to her mouth as if to say ‘chup’.)

Sagarika: Oh, its ok. He’s right. You should invite Nitin over more often. He’s great company at the dinner table.

Kid: Grandma says because of the food inflation, she cannot afford to have Gadkariji over for dinner. Also, we’ve exhausted our quota of subsidized LPG cylinders.

(Mrs. Shinde gives the kid another angry look and shoos him away. Arvind Kejriwal enters the room with the power bill in his hand. Everyone looks up at him.)

Kejriwal (poring over the fine print on the bill): 10 times the bill is an unfair penalty. This is extortion. Don’t pay it. I will go and restore your connection now.

(He opens his toolbox and takes out a few tools like crimper, wire and screwdriver. Suddenly Salman Khurshid storms in with police personnel and grabs Arvind Kejriwal’s collar.)

Khurshid: What you folks are doing is illegal. Stealing power? I will have you thrown in jail. (pointing towards Mrs. Shinde) arrest her also.

Mrs. Shinde: Who do you think you are?

Khurshid: I am the Law Minister of this country

Kid (barging in gleefully): Dadi ma, he’s the cheap man who embarrassed Sonia Gandhi by doing a scam worth just a few lakhs.

(Suddenly Sushil Kumar Shinde enters the house)

Shinde: Thanks, my dear grandson. I had forgotten completely about that petty scam.

Khurshid (taken aback): Er…Shindeji, what are you doing here?

The policemen salute Sushil Kumar Shinde.

Mrs. Shinde (menacingly moves towards Khurshid):  He is the Home Minister of this country and I am his Home Minister. You have entered my home. Now how will you go back?

(Khurshid turns around and runs away screaming ‘see you in Farrukhabad’. Arvind Kejriwal meanwhile restores the power connection and the lights come on.)

Pratibha Patil (clapping her hands):  Wah, beta. Where did you learn these things. Never saw politicians good at solving practical problems.

Arvind Kejriwal (smiling bashfully): Madam, no big deal. I have done engineering from IIT.

Sagorika Ghosh: Wow! You are an electrician from ITI! This just shows the opportunities for upward mobility in this country.

(Arvind Kejriwal ignores Sagorika and touches Pratibha Patil’s feet.)

Kejriwal: Madam, bless me in my mission to eradicate corruption from this country.

Pratibha Patil puts her hand on his head and says “YashaswiBhava”.

Arvind Kejriwal and Mayank Gandhi leave the house, satisfied with their work. Suddenly Arvind Kejriwal puts his hand to his head and says “Hey, Who stole my Aam Aadmi cap?”


Related posts:

  1. Arvind Kejriwal to reprise Hanuman in Ramayan remake, Anna to play Lord Ram
  2. Arvind Kejriwal legally trademarks Anna’s image as India against Corruption’s brand mascot
  3. Rahul Gandhi visits Shindes for dal-chawal after Sushil Kumar Shinde proclaims his dalit heritage
  4. Fatigued Arvind Kejriwal takes break from civil society activism, quits Team Anna for I-banking job
  5. Naughty Kapil Sibal caught editing Arvind Kejriwal’s Wikipedia entry
 



  • http://vijayanganapathy.blogspot.com Vijayan

    Excellent Pankaj! You’ve combined several situations into one nice incident. I am impressed.

    • Pankaj

      Vijayan, Thanks a lot for your feedback.

  • ashraf tharuvara

    The ending was really crisp..and of course funny. Good work; congrats.

    • Pankaj

      Ashraf, thanks a lot.

  • Arti Singh

    hillarious skit…simply loved it…great satire!

    • Pankaj

      Arti, Thanks a lot

  • Theultimatechennaisuperkingsfan

    Cap stealing one was awesome….guys..how 2 know who authored a ut news report?

  • Theultimatechennaisuperkingsfan

    Sad 2 note that my harmless comment abt jrm ramesh toilets.was deleted…hope u guys revive my spirit with a ravishastri article….keep it up guys

    • Admin

      Hey Theultimatechennaisuperkingsfan

      Sorry for the comments disappearing. Some maintenance is going on at our end, and the comments made within a 2 hour window have disappeared. We have it in our databases, and they’ll appear soon.

      Admin

  • Theultimatechennaisuperkingsfan

    Rarely do u guys publish the name of d author along with ur news report…..dont u guys worry abt other guys stealing credit….pls dont enforce registration 4 free and such other bullsh%t…but pls see that the fans of unreal times reply to d original author..keep up the good show….i have to read ur latest cricket article…bye guys..thnx 4 understanding…and responding immediately..

  • Lokesh Bahety

    The author and his details are on the top right of your screen.Hope that helps :-)

    • Pankaj

      Thank u Lokesh

  • theultimatechennaisuperkingsfan

    I think it doesnt load in mobile version…sorry 4 d misunderstanding……
    By the way..how do u guys find time to churn out these mindblowing stuff:)??
    Some of the articles even makes us to pause and deeply observe the world around..the unreal times also attempts to bring about social change thru their articles right….
    Sorry 4 my loooooong comments…but as an aspiring writer,i do feel that an author shud hav d satisfaction that his work has been recognised..

    • Pankaj

      Thanks a lot for your words of encouragement.

  • http://ashwinsatirekumar.blogspot.com Ashwin

    Nice one Pankaj :)

    • Pankaj

      Thanks Ashwin.