Indian Army confers honorary rank of Subedar-Major on Piyush Chawla

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India’s overachieving cricketer Piyush Chawla was conferred the rank of honorary Subedar-Major in the Territorial Army by General Bikram Singh for his extraordinary achievements on the field of cricket.

With this honour, Chawla joins the club of other cricketers, including Kapil Dev, Sachin Tendulkar and Dhoni, who too hold honorary ranks in the armed forces. While Kapil Dev and Dhoni are honorary Lt. Colonels in the Territorial Army, Tendulkar is an honorary Group Captain in the Indian Air Force.

The right-arm wrong’un bowler sported army’s olive green uniform at the function held in his honour at the Territorial Army headquarters in the national capital.

‘Piyush has set an example by his discipline and supreme dedication. His willing the team forward from the fine leg, remaining ultra-cool in the face of barrage of sixes all the while maintaining a smile on the baby face, and conning the selectors again and again and again into picking him are signs of an over-achiever and a go-getter,’ an Army spokesperson said.

‘Tricking the batsman by calling himself a leg-spinner without ever bowling a leg-spin delivery is nothing short of genius. He has the unique ability to deceive the batsman by bowling half-pitch straightish deliveries while he is expecting a flighted leg-spinner is another indication of an ace-strategist,’ he said.

While the Subedar-Majors in the Army were not entirely pleased with this gesture, General Bikram Singh reminded them that Piyush is actually a world-cup winner. The General said, “Some of our JCOs are prone to apathy due to their lack of qualifications to become officers. This honorary title to Piyush serves to remind them that talent is not everything and capability should not be a hindrance to achievement.”

On hearing the news, an indignant Vijay Kumar – London Olympics Silver-medalist who actually achieved a great feat and got promoted as Subedar-Major -  is learnt to have threatened to resign from the Army  unless given a senior commissioned rank and an officer-rank post.

Our sources also informed us that another extraordinary Indian over-achiever and ex-President Pratibha Patil might have had a hand in this honour to Piyush – her favorite cricketer. Unconfirmed reports also say that Rajiv Shukla – IPL chief, MP, MoS and India Today’s overachiever – has also seconded this.

Delighted over the honour, Piyush’s mother and grandmother are now busy looking for a baby-faced bride for him. Preity Zinta is learnt to have been under consideration.

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