Sibal reveals Made in China tattoo to allay fears about cheap Chinese goods flooding Indian markets


Union Minister Kapil Sibal today came out of the closet, so to speak, and openly proclaimed his love for the People’s Republic of China by revealing a “Made in China” tattoo on his fore-arm in a bid to present a benign image of India’s giant neighbour across the Himlayas.  That Sibal is an unabashed Sinophile has long been suspected:  the erudite lawyer turned Minister has passionately defended the draconian Section 66A of the IT Act, advocated pre-screening of content on the social media, and his brainchild, the Aakash tablet, has reportedly been manufactured in China.

“So you see, there is no reason to feel about the Aakash tablet being made in China. Thanks to overpaid Chinese workers, Indian consumers will also enjoy drop-dead prices,” said Sibal, displaying his tattooed fore-arm to the press.

Sibal’s father, senior advocate Shri H.L.Sibal shed more light on the profound influence the big dragon had on the impressionable mind of the young Sibal growing up in the dusty by-lanes of Jalandhar, where his family had shifted after partition. “Kapil puttar a huge head and an amazing frame, ideal for wrestling and still does. I wanted him to become a pehelwan like the late Dara Singh and make Punjab proud, but destiny had different plans for him. As a child, he was always inspired by Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan. In fact, Kapil’s room is still full of their entire movie DVDs. He was so inspired by Bruce Lee’s ‘First of Fury’ that he decided to get the words ‘Made in China’ tattooed close to his fist.”

More was revealed by Sibal’s better half, Smt. Promila Sibal, who said, “Kapil and I are vastly different from each other. I am a sucker for Bollywood movies, whereas Kapil hardly ever watches them. The only Hindi movie he has seen with me in recent times, is Chandni Chowk to China. I still remember that day, I was so shocked when Kapil wanted to watch the movie with me, First Day First Show. Of course, how much he loathed the movie is another subject. Whenever we go out for dinner, it’s always these fancy, Chinese restaurants which he absolutely loves. People in love usually tattoo their lovers’ names, but for Kapil, ‘Made in China’ it is!”

To celebrate Shri Sibal’s pro-China inclinations, Walmart has commissioned special Sibal dolls with ‘made in China’ tattoos that will soon be available in the retail giant’s outlets across the country. Of course, these dolls will all be made in China.

Ashwin Kumar

About Ashwin Kumar

1 of the proud columnists of URT, former co-editor of URT Tamil, amateur musician, Real Harris Jayaraj devotee, UnReal T. Rajendar fanatic, passionate about stopping female foeticide.